Rebelliousness

Samuel spoke to Saul in 1 Samuel and said this.

"For rebellion is as the sin of divination, And insubordination is as iniquity and idolatry. Because you have rejected the word of the LORD, He has also rejected you from being king." 1 Samuel 15:23

Did you catch that? NASB says "rebellion is as the sin of divination, And insubordination is as iniquity and idolatry". I am not a big fan of the living translation, but I think it comes across much better when put this way. "Rebellion is as sinful as witchcraft, and stubbornness as bad as worshiping idols."

When I see rebellion in my children, it really hurts my heart. I get a glimpse of what God feels when we are rebellious in our ways. Lately one of my children has been dealing with rebellion. The attituide, the actions, the noises, the stomping, all of it adds up to rebellion. She calls it anger, and I do not doubt it. Tonight we talked about that anger and how God commands us to be angry but sin not.

Eph. 4:26,27 BE ANGRY, AND yet DO NOT SIN; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity.

Eph. 4:31 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.

To my nine year old, this seems impossible. She said, "Dad, I see you not get angry and I do not know how you do it." I told her that as an adult who has followed Christ from her age to now that there are three things that help me control my anger, which often leads to Rebelliousness.

1. The Holy Spirit lives inside of me and there is a very real feeling that I get from Him when the wrong type of anger is close. When I am wronged and I want to retaliate. Or something I cannot control goes wrong. The Holy Spirit directs me in how to respond, and this only comes from Him. Learning to listen to Him is an art form, but it's really easy and it works.

2. Knowing that there is good anger and bad anger and how to respond to each kind. Like being angry when someone steals from you. Choosing to tell someone like your teacher, or a police man instead of screaming and trying to hurt the thief. It's good to be upset when wronged, it's built into our very fabric to desire justice. The response is where we define our character and how we feel anger but sin not.

3. Scripture, scripture, and more scripture. It's a mixture of the Holy Spirit and memorized verses that deal with all issues of life that really make for a Godly person. The more we read and are transformed by the word and the more we memorize it, the better off we are at handling life in general. Discerning how to be angry but sin not comes in part from knowing the scriptures.

This all sounds so basic, and it is. But when you have a nine year old who wants to please God, but is in tears because her flesh continues to win and she does not understand why she fails to grow quickly, it helps to break it down into bite sized pieces. I tell my kids all the time that they are my kids, but only for awhile. God has given them to me to raise and train and one day when they are ready, they will leave. They are always welcome back into our home, but God will give them the desire to have their own life and then they will see clearly that mom and dad had them on loan for a few short years where every moment counted.

It also helps to remind them of this because when they are disobedient or disrespectful or otherwise towards mom and dad, they are really acting against the representatives that God has placed over them. In other words, God is my boss and I answer to Him. How you act towards me when you dislike the rules and the consequences that we enact which we believe are biblical, then guess who you are really being rebellious towards?

Food for thought.

Decisions

Today I am dedicating time to decision making, in particular there is one huge thing that I need to decide on, and it is not an easy one at all. Deciding one way means taking no action, the other way, immediate action. It's rare but I am 50/50 on this decision. I can both support it and shoot it down and depending on who I talk to, it's just about the same.

More importantly though, I am discovering something about myself that I do not love. Do I ask God first and then seek counsel, or do I flip that around. The answer is that I seek counsel first. I talk about it with other people, then I bring it before God. Of course it's more than obvious that this is the wrong way to go about it. First and foremost my life is to be directed by God and then lived in His power. Of course I must go to Him first. How silly it is to do otherwise. Not to say that God has not in His vast mercy, gone ahead and given me blessings and directions, even though I went about it wrongly. He is a good God, and He does good things. I do desire to follow Christ and obey Him fully.

So today my focus is bring my request before God first, then if needed I can seek Godly counsel.

Sharp Mind

Making the choices necessary to keep my mind sharp takes a lot more self control than I have been able to muster lately. There are so many forms of entertainment that offer such temptation. Television, Netflix, Video Games, Internet and browsing, Coding web applications and web sites. All these things are not bad in and of themselves, but taken without portion control and wise time management make for bad results. I can feel the effects of all the electronic entertainment when I try to pray, read the Bible, or just be still before God. I find myself wanting stimulation and I find the silence painful. I sit in the quiet and try to focus, but I cannot, at least not for very long.

This is obviously a huge issue. The relationship I need and desire with God is built and maintained in the quiet. It's going to take some resolve and hard work to get back to the place where I can be in the quiet and without electronics and still be productive. Even now I am thinking that a few episodes of my favorite show playing in the background as I find things to do around the house or on the computer will help this sleepless time pass quickly. But I have to fight that and do what I know will bring me healing, blessings, and most importantly, closeness to God. It's very difficult, but it really comes down to what I want more. Immediate satiation of my fleshly desires or the fruit of being disciplined.

3AM Viewing of Star Trek

Star Trek Voyager to be exact, and I am watching with my nine year old daughter. See, I don't sleep much at night. I hate that this is true, but it is. Maybe in the future I will get this ironed out. Tonight I get to drag my daughter into my late night. She cannot sleep either, but it's not common for her or anyone to be awake at these horrible hours. I am thankful for my Star Trek Voyager buddy tonight.

What if

the world does end this weekend. It's not even a remote possibility, at least not in a biblical sense. Harold Camping is wrong. In the wake of this weekend there will be a lot of hurt people in the body of Christ. People who not only lose earthly things, but their faith as well. This is a tragedy.

But what if? What if this is the last Tuesday night ever, the last Wednesday morning for all eternity? What if it were true? I believe Jesus said it best. Be ready.

Like a thief in the night He is coming. 1 Thessalonians 5:2 So be ready. Ready for Christ to come tonight, this weekend or in a thousand years. It's not ours to know when, just to be ready.

It's one of those days.

When my flesh takes more of a front seat position than the new person I am in Christ. When this happens I always feel guilt and frustration. As a long time Christian I do understand and believe the words of God spoken through Paul in Romans.

There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1

I am not as concerned for my salvation, although I must always be running self checks and staying close enough to my brothers and sisters in Christ so that any divergence from "occasional sin" into "habitual sin" should be noticed and examined. I am concerned, however, for my relationship with my Lord. There is damage inflicted upon the fellowship that I have with God. The relationship I have now, here in my space-time continuum, is hurt by my actions and attitudes. My salvation is secure and God really does see me as I will be, not as I am, when it comes to justice and Holiness. But I am a creature of this world and as such, I am subject to it's laws and consequences.

"Oh father, Lord of heaven and earth. I have treated you as less than ultimate. I have put other things before you, things that satisfy my temporary flesh. To treat you as anything other than supreme is an offense punishable by eternal death. You are God, you are the only God and you are worth so much more than anything created. I am sorry Father for putting anything before you and choosing to feed my flesh rather than spend my time worshiping you with my actions and loving you with ALL my heart, my mind and my soul. I have chosen dark places hidden from the light, which is unbecoming a new creature who is made for the light. I know this and I want to truly repent and 'Go and sin no more' as you commanded the woman caught in sin. Go and sin no more, go and love and worship my savior, my redeemer, my closest and dearest friend. I am sorry and I can only ask now for true repentance so that I am no in the habit of breaking our fellowship. I love you Lord, please forgive me and renew our relationship."